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You read the newspaper. It includes an article about the recent bankruptcy of the James Randi Education Foundation after a multitude of million dollar payouts.
You read the newspaper. It contains a phenomenally ill-reasoned editorial about the building of a religious building near the site of a tragedy.
You read the newspaper. At least, you try to. Large sections have been cut out for coupons.
You read the newspaper. You notice that if you hold it up to the light, pinholes in the paper over certain letters reveal the message, "been discovered go to ground".
You read the newspaper. It includes an article about a local resident's unusual wind-chimes. It seems to have been written just to take up space on the page. _________________ Naughty | Nice | Can't Decide
Joined: Jan 19, 2010 Posts: 276 Location: The internet
Posted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 9:30 pm Post subject:
You read the newspaper. It warns of an impending heat wave, and as you read it it promptly catches fire.
You read the newspaper. In it is an article exposing the supposed existence of demons as an elaborate hoax. About halfway through it reduces to the words, "It's just a dream, this isn't real..." and "Please help me!" repeated over and over. You wonder how the writer managed to get paid for this.
You read the newspaper. An article details the psychological and physical effects of long-term sleep deprivation, which is apparently exceedingly common throughout the planes.
You read the newspaper. In it is a harsh criticism depicting various doomsday prophets who predict the end of the universe will come this January as "scare mongers" and "frauds". It assures the reader that the end won't be at least until next June. _________________ Murder Monkey
'You read the newspaper. It is a local rural paper, the headline reads: "Giant Rabbit Escapes From Hutch, Local Farmer's Crops Decimated".'
'You read the newspaper. Half of the paper is dedicated to a breaking story about a mysterious angular shape appearing in the sky over St Germaine'.
'You read the newspaper. It is a religious paper describing a recent prophesy of an impending apocalypse.'
'You read the newspaper. It has a feature article about the growing spread of osteoporosis and basic health measures to prevent it.'
'You read the newspaper. The headline reads "International Prices of Brass Plummets, Factories Swamped".
'You read the newspaper. The headline article is about the mysterious disappearance of recently deceased corpses from their graves.'
'You read the newspaper. The editorial section features a writer who goes to great length to ridicule the over-inflated healthcare budget that has led to a hospital appearing on 'every street corner in town'.'
'You read the newspaper. You begin to wonder if you didn't just waste 15 minutes of your life.'
'You read the newspaper. It appears to have been one of the last papers printed, with panicked descriptions throughout of massive black voids appearing across the world and swallowing whole cities.' _________________ Sihoiba said, "Unfortunately he resisted arrest by lighting himself on fire"
You read the newspaper. As you read, the content seems to slowly change from vague descriptions of current events to something beyond human comprehension. By the third page, you are unable to make out what the writers were trying to say.
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